A lie

Says motivational speaker Denis Waitley,

“Procrastination is the fear of success. People procrastinate because they are afraid of the success that they know will result if they move ahead now. Because success is heavy, carries a responsibility with it, it is much easier to procrastinate and live on the 'someday I’ll' philosophy.”

Denis Waitley, I disagree.

Procrastination is not the fear of success: it is the fear of failure. It might also be the fear of unpleasant hard work. But it is not the fear of success. I do not procrastinate writing seminar papers and chunks of my thesis because I'm thinking, "Man, if I move ahead on this now, I will succeed and dazzle my professor, and, oh, wouldn't that be frightening?"

No, no, Denis.

I procrastinate because I'm thinking, "If I write this now and turn in the ideas currently floating around in my head, my professor will finally know that I'm a phony who has nothing really interesting to say. So, rather than writing a flop, I'll blog or check my email."

Because, really, who can fail at checking email?

Midnight, or, Avoiding homework

One (1) year until graduation means approximately four (4) eight to ten page seminar papers and one (1) roughly thirty page thesis left to write. This makes a grand total of about seventy (70) pages of polished academic writing to be produced over the next year.

Seventy pages of polished academic writing translates (according to my calculations) into the need for about twenty-five (25) cartons of ice cream. Assuming I was able to purchase said ice cream on sale for about $3.00 per carton, I would spend $75.00 on ice cream in the next year.

Oh, the hidden costs of graduate school.

I need to go to bed. Or get to work. Or get some ice cream . . .

procrastination

you are what inspires me to write in my blog

you are what keeps me up until midnight even though i have work at 6:45am

you are the reason why i am only half-way done with the huge project that is due at 2:00p.m. tomorrow

you are what keeps me looking for random youtube videos or new songs

you drive me to the fridge to scavenge for cold pizza

you are what finally gets me to get started on my project

you are what drives me to the library, even though i swore that place off last semester

you are the driving force of my life, my muse

i wish you weren't